There are a lot of subtleties involved in growing up with a psychiatric illness that don’t often get talked about. The news covers cases of severe psychosis when a violently ill person ends up in jail; the most apparent symptoms of depression (the “common cold” of mental illness) are gathering more and more attention on social media; even the most specific books on particular psychiatric disorders only scratch the surface of the complexities of actually living with those diseases. The common factor in all of these scenarios is that they only spread knowledge of the most basic or most intense aspects of having a mental illness. The subtleties get overlooked.
That’s why I started this blog. As a person who has suffered from borderline personality disorder from a very young age (if not birth), it’s my goal to report the most intricate complexities of living with a severe psychiatric condition in accessible language. Over the past decade, I have found that my illness permeates virtually everything I experience. Sometimes that’s devastating, but usually it’s just mildly irritating. The devastating effects of BPD (and mental illness in general) have generated the most attention and research. The mild inconveniences, however, often get looked over.
However, it’s desperately important to me that the general masses comprehend not just what mental illness is, but what it is to be mentally ill. What is it that people like me are thinking when we perform the disordered behaviors that so confound the psychologically healthy general public? What is it like for us to know something logically when our emotional minds are screaming at us to believe the polar opposite thing? What does psychosis actually feel like?
How do we get up in the morning knowing how much the day is going to hurt?
Since the foremost goal of my articles is to inform readers’ most detailed – and oftentimes, most taboo – curiosities about living with mental illness, I encourage anyone and everyone to send me their questions about my experience with BPD, depression, and anxiety. I especially welcome the type of question that can’t likely be answered by doing scientific research; rather, I prefer to tell you about the intimate, poetic details of living with a disordered mind.
So please, take up arms with me against the silence that still surrounds mental illness.