Electroconvulsive Therapy and Memory Loss

I recently finished a three-month course of electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) to treat my extremely stubborn depressive disorder. The process required me to make a few minor lifestyle changes: I couldn't drive or drink alcohol, and I had to fast in a very specific way the day before each of my 19 appointments. Fortunately, though, all… Continue reading Electroconvulsive Therapy and Memory Loss


I Don’t Want To Sleep (When I Might Wake Up Depressed)

It's hard to go to sleep happy when when you know the world might be ending inside your head when you wake up. As I write this, it's past midnight and my body is begging me to rest. I've been busy all day for the first time in a while, packing up my things as… Continue reading I Don’t Want To Sleep (When I Might Wake Up Depressed)

Articles · MST3K

I’m (Potentially) Moving to Minnesota Because of a Puppet Show

Just hear me out. Sometimes, if you're extremely lucky, you find something so wonderful and pure, so unapologetically cheerful, so transcendentally beautiful that it changes your life forever and you have no choice but to let it influence all of your major decisions. For me, that thing is the '90s TV godsend, Mystery Science Theater 3000. It's… Continue reading I’m (Potentially) Moving to Minnesota Because of a Puppet Show


The Tragic Distraction of Faith-Based Science

I’ve lived in Boulder, Colorado for ten years. There are many things to love about this town, most of which are the direct result of how open-minded the people are. They’re typically very caring, liberal, and free-spirited. They also believe a lot of bullshit. It seems as if the average person has crystals that "channel… Continue reading The Tragic Distraction of Faith-Based Science


Earthworms/Childhood Insanity

I've heard many different arguments about when and how people with borderline personality disorder initially develop symptoms. Is the illness so thoroughly genetic that indicators of it can be observed from birth? Or do those diseased genes have to be triggered by an event or series of events that occurs when the child is a… Continue reading Earthworms/Childhood Insanity


The Hardest Part of Being Depressed

Recently, in a Q&A with my readers, I was asked, "What's the greatest challenge you face every day?" I was immediately intrigued by the question, because I tend to think about my struggles with mental illness on a sliding scale, not in absolutes. So instead of thinking about a particular problem as the "greatest" challenge… Continue reading The Hardest Part of Being Depressed


Seven Challenges of Late-Stage Depression

*To help support this blog and get unique, personalized articles from me, check out my Patreon here! Seven Challenges of Late-Stage Depression Fatigue, feeling hopeless, lack of motivation, and changes in sleep and diet - these are some of the problems that can be observed from the earliest days of many depressive episodes. However, after… Continue reading Seven Challenges of Late-Stage Depression


Treating Medication-Resistant Depression

As it turns out, I don't respond to psychiatric medication. I've tried dozens of mood-lifting pills in the past decade, and none of them has consistently worked. Those that do create any beneficial effect usually only do so mildly, and they wear off in a matter of weeks, leaving me just as despondent as I… Continue reading Treating Medication-Resistant Depression