As I write this, I’m sitting in a bar in downtown Denver across the street from a locally-owned theater where two people I love are performing a comedy show. The award-winning comedians, affectionately known as “The Mads” because of their roles as mad scientists on Mystery Science Theater 3000 (MST3K), hired me three years ago… Continue reading Fuck Mental Illness.
With talk of dissociation becoming ever more prevalent, I’ve noticed a lot of people using the word to describe everything from mild boredom to extreme episodes of mental illness. While I’m grateful this phenomenon is making its way into the public spotlight, I’d like to clarify what I mean when I say I’m dissociated. It’s… Continue reading What Constant Dissociation Feels Like
Note: I do not condone listening to advice from the voices in your head. I do not condone creating fictional relationships. I do not condone any of the choices I’ve made that are described in this essay. I simply wish to reflect on my decisions as a unique individual with borderline personality disorder. This is… Continue reading The Voices In My Head Keep Me Sane
Six months ago, I had a really hard time accomplishing anything. I had a manuscript for a short story that I had been working on for five years sitting on my desktop. I was enrolled in an online college course, but making progress was like pulling teeth. My friends dwindled in number because I didn’t… Continue reading Spiraling Up: How I Rise Past Depression and Anxiety
Last week I agreed to go to a cabin in the wilderness of southern Wyoming with a group of friends. We all needed a vacation, and there would be quaint, woodsy things to do, they assured me. Hammocks to hang, hummingbirds to watch, and no pesky Internet to distract us from each others' company. Plus… Continue reading Silver Linings (Spiders Are Jerks)
I grew up in the nation-state of Boulder, Colorado. In Boulder, many a college student’s idea of “independence” is spending their parents’ money and doing laundry at their parents’ house and texting with their parents’ mobile data. (Okay, so I do all those things.) And while there’s nothing inherently wrong with that, it does raise… Continue reading Adulting is Hard (With Half-Assed Apologies to Boulder Millennials)
I was (probably) born with borderline personality disorder. When I was four, my mother noticed my obstinate tendency to stay angry long past when it was appropriate. At seven, I started listening to Evanescence religiously; by 11 I was talking about painting my room black. I was 12 when they told me I was sick,… Continue reading An Analysis of Childhood Mental Illness