As it turns out, I don't respond to psychiatric medication. I've tried dozens of mood-lifting pills in the past decade, and none of them has consistently worked. Those that do create any beneficial effect usually only do so mildly, and they wear off in a matter of weeks, leaving me just as despondent as I… Continue reading Treating Medication-Resistant Depression
*Trigger warning: Mild wrist-cutting. Note: Though masochism plays an important role in this story, I won't analyze it too deeply here, because it's beside the point of this article. I'll save that for other essays, like this one. ... This is a recounting of the disrespectful and ignorant way I was treated by supposed medical… Continue reading Medical Doctors Need Better Mental Health Education
*Note: In this article, I write that psychiatric drugs have never worked well for me. However, I'm an unusual case: they do work for most people. In no way do I wish to condone that anyone stop taking pills that they have been prescribed, nor do I want to deter anyone from seeking relief from psychiatric drugs… Continue reading The Emotional Burn Victim
...to walk away from you.
(with special thanks to Dr. Jens Foell for edits and suggestions) (image of positron emission tomography [PET] scans borrowed from the Mayo Clinic) As a person with borderline personality disorder, I have often received the question, “When did you develop BPD?” As it turns out, the answer is not as straightforward as it may seem.… Continue reading The Origins of Mental Illness
In my last post, "Normal: Part One", I described my teenage lifestyle as a stubborn, gothic young woman with undiagnosed borderline personality disorder and, unsurprisingly, deep depression and anger problems. I explained my seething hatred for anything that could be considered "normal", because my emotional experience of the world was so diseased and unusual that… Continue reading Normal: Part Two
When I was 12, my worst fear was being normal. I was the token goth girl who dressed in nothing but purple and black every day, whether I was going to school, the grocery store, or a family dinner. I exasperated family members by dressing this way on literally every occasion. The goth style reflected the way… Continue reading Normal: Part One